Master Your Inner Critic

What is the inner critic? How does it affect people’s lives? How does it hinder some people from reaching their full potential and realising their dreams, and stop others from enjoying the success they have achieved?

The inner critic is that voice that many people have in their heads which says things like: ‘Why on earth did you say/do that?’, ‘You’re hopeless, you’ll never be a success’; ‘You think you have done well, but you still have not achieved X and Y’. For many people these messages have been going on their whole life. However, by using simple techniques you can find ways to master your inner critic and release your inner wisdom, thereby allowing you to approach life in a more balanced way. Another benefit is that you can release your fun child, and bring more laughter and joy into your life.

Here are some easy actions to take to master your inner critic:

Start by appreciating yourself - Each day write down three things that you appreciate about yourself. This could include characteristics that you like, things that you do, and challenges that you have overcome. This is to counter the negative messages you send yourself on a daily or even hourly basis.
Take the sting out of the inner critic - there are two ways of doing this:
- People often see pictures inside their heads that are associated with the inner critic. Sometimes this is a person, a dragon or some other character. Dress it up in a tutu or shrink it until you can’t see it. Make some changes to it in order to lesson it’s power over you
- You can also change the tone or speed of the inner critic’s voice to lessen the impact: turn it into a cartoon voice, give it hiccups, turn down the volume or speed it up. Do anything that results in you not taking it so seriously
Become your own best friend - We would not say to our best friend what we say to ourselves, so when you are facing challenges and need encouragement think about what your best friend would say to you
Nurture yourself - many people with a strong inner critic are not good at nurturing themselves. In fact they usually beat themselves up when they feel down, feel ill or are facing difficult situations. So what can you do to nurture and support yourself?
Listen to your fears - the inner critic tends to dismiss our fears and belittle us for having them. The problem is that when we ignore them they just grow inside us. Instead listen to them and use your wise self to decide how you can deal with them in an objective way.

Master Your Inner Critic

By practising using one or two of these ideas each day, you will start to feel more positive about yourself and your life.

Melanie Greene is a Chartered Occupational Psychologist with 21 years experience as a consultant, coach and trainer working within the private and public sector. Her work includes enhancing team working, developing manager’s coaching and performance management skills, effective communication and stress management. She set up her own consultancy, Grovelands Associates in 1991 (www.grovelands.org.uk). Her first book ‘Master Your Inner Critic: Release Your Inner Wisdom’ was published by Summersdale Publishing in January 2008. The book came about from her own experiences of tackling this topic, as well as her work with clients. Melanie’s work is about helping individuals to realise their full potential to be both successful in what they do, and enjoy their lives. With this in mind she writes a free coaching email newsletter ‘Inspire’ to provide regular hints, tips and inspiration on a different topic each month. To subscribe free of charge email Melanie at mg@grovelands.org.uk

- Melanie Green

One Response to “Master Your Inner Critic”

Welcome to iON Oxford Tube and my first blog entry… : iON OXFORD TUBE on February 26th, 2009 9:21 pm

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